The strongest emotions I felt were loneliness, sadness, anger, guilt and fear. I felt like something was very wrong and I had to just sit there and watch it all happen. I thought it was a random wave of procastination and sadness, but as the days passed I felt like I wanted to get better but I couldn’t. Not only did I not socialize with anyone, or if I did I acted very irritated, but I ignored calls from loved ones that live far away, I didn’t attend my online classes and I had no intention of taking care of myself or the space around me. But this time, besides the back pain and awful amount of cigarette smoke in my lungs, there was somethinng even more harmful happening inside of me. It wasn’t the first or last time, it was an usual scenery: days passing by, feeling bored of everything and sleeping all day. What really happened on the other side of the screen that you’re looking at right now is the following: I sat in bed for 2 weeks straight. I started looking inward and understanding myself, observing what I felt and why I felt it so that I could put the pieces of the puzzle together. I tried explaining it, but I guess you can’t explain what you don’t understand. I know it sounds really fucking corny and all but it’s true.ĭISCLAIMER : I am not a mental health professional but I do think that getting professional help is incredibly valuable and important if you are struggling with anything.Īlright, I won’t start dwelling on the past and stuff, as you probably know (or not, if you’re not here from Twitter) the last few weeks have been very strange for me. However, I know some of you struggle with what I also struggle with right now and I feel like if anything can help a human being in this situation is knowing that you are not alone. I’m not good at describing my exact emotions and putting myself out there in this honest, raw way still feels a bit strange to me. I debated writing about this for a long time now. More ups than downs? tw: mentions of bad mental health
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